Sunday, August 12, 2012

Why is Being Liberal So Hard? Romney and Ryan Bring Back the Fun

SOMETIMES, IT'S TOUGH BEING a liberal. Rush and his legions of Dittoheads call you a "libertard" and pretend they're better Americans than you. As a liberal, you think this country and the world could be better and want to help make those twin ideals come true. Conservatives warn that you're a communist and insist you and your type want to wipe your feet (or worse) on the U. S. Constitution.

And when all else fails, and conservatives start losing the case on merits, they pull out the Big God Gun. They claim to have the Lord on their side.

How do you argue with that?

Then comes a bit of serendipity. The Republicans field a ticket with a Mormon at the top and a Catholic in second position. Mitt Romney for President! Paul Ryan waits in the wings.

As a liberal, you begin to feel that healthy liberal doubt rising again. How, for example, can people like Ann Coulter insist they have God on their side, when God can't seem to get His Own message straight? Is the Bible the last and only true word from on high? Is it where we go for all answers about gay marriage and abortion and scientific topics like global warming or not? What about the Book of Mormon? Is that what God, speaking to Moses thousands of years ago, simply left out?

Ross Douthat, a leading conservative thinker, argues in today's New York Times that Romney needs to open up his campaign narrative in coming weeks. He needs to let voters catch a glimpse of his Mormon faith.

As Douthat sees it:
Romney’s years as a bishop would be woven into a biography that emphasized his piety and decency, introducing Americans to the Romney who shut down his business to hunt for a colleague’s missing daughter, the Romney who helped build a memorial park when a friend’s son died of cystic fibrosis, the Romney who lent money to renters to help them buy a house he owned, and so on down a list of generous gestures and good deeds.

In this scenario, faith is an absolute positive, and, conversely, we can assume, lack of faith is a liberal failing. Douthat argues that during a visit to Salt Lake City this summer he was struck by the emphasis the Church of the Latter-Day Saints put on "faith, family and neighborliness."

As for those bedraggled, woe-begotten liberals? They assign the key role in society to the state.

A LIBERAL ENDS UP, RIGHT ABOUT THERE, scratching his or her noggin'. A liberal believes in both freedom of religion and individual freedom. Let Mormons practice their faith in their beautiful temples, with the figure of Moroni displayed on high, blowing his trumpet. If they believe Joseph Smith found golden tablets on a hillside near Palmyra, New York in 1830, and believe these outline the last true version of the Word of God, let them pray as they like. A good and decent member of the Church of the Latter-Day Saints is a good and decent human being, first, second and last. The same is true of the good and decent Catholic. It is the same again, when we are talking about good and decent Jews or Muslims or Sikhs.

If you're a liberal you have a few questions, not because you hate religion or God or this nation. (In fact, even though you aren't sure, you think God probably loves not only all Americans, but all human beings.) First, if Romney reads one religious book and Ryan reads another and those devout Evangelicals who represent the base of the GOP believe them both wrong and put forward a third version of the truth, why must we assume these people know what they're talking about when they quote chapter and verse on subjects like gay marriage?

If the Book of Mormon goes on in great detail about the battle between Lamanites and Nephites, two ancient peoples on the continent of North America, a liberal says, "Let the Mormons worship in peace, for they are human, and they have basic freedoms and rights. They do me no harm in the practice of their beliefs."

Still, the liberal mind swirls. Why do so many right-wing types, who say they care more about religious freedom than liberals, oppose the building of mosques in places like Tennessee? How is a good and decent Muslim, reading his or her Koran, any more a threat to the individual rights and freedoms of any other American than a good and decent Mormon or Catholic? If two Mormons marry in a special temple ceremony, or even a Catholic and Mormon marry each other, how does that effect anyone else save that couple? In the same way, a liberal wonders how the equation changes if two gays marry? When a conservative says, angrily, "You want to destroy marriage as it has existed for thousands of years!" you can't help but wonder. What were Mormons leaders thinking, when they allowed polygamy, under church doctrine, until 1890?

In fact, if you're liberal, you find yourself muttering, "And this is the same church that offered all kinds of support to Proposition 8, the California referendum to ban gay marriage in that state?

Sometimes it's great fun to be liberal, as it is now, with this "liberal" mixed marriage of Ryan and Romney. Because at times like this you get to confuse conservatives with logic and fact.

Here's one to try on the next right-wing type who says you hate God and kittens and the United States of America. When they insist we need to put prayer back in public schools, ask them exactly which prayer and led by whom? When they say God is against gay marriage, and quote from Leviticus, ask them their position on the sacrifice of goats. After all, if you're a liberal you wonder why there are something like 182 verses on that topic in Leviticus and but one related to homosexual behavior.

Better yet, next time Ann Coulter opens her mouth in any public forum, to spew out more hate, can some good and decent liberal in the audience simply stand and inquire, "Ann, at 49 or 51 (there's dispute over her birthdate) are you still a virgin?" Because, let's face it, conservatives, if the Good Book isn't clear about abortion, it's certainly clear on the topic of sex before marriage.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT Rush Limbaugh, now four-times married, might say. If Ann isn't still a virgin, then she must be a slut.


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7 comments:

  1. Outstanding! Very funny :-)!!!

    I admit to having a problem with additional "scripture", as Jesus warned of this, but the Paul Ryan pick shows Romney is serious about the debt. I like that you make fun of my dream girl :-)

    Jay Vinny

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    1. Paul Ryan's plan would cause the debt to balloon even further by slashing government revenue and destroying the economy. Just so you know. Assuming that you were, in fact, being serious and not sarcastic, because I totally couldn't tell.

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  2. I really Enjoyed this Post, and I'm going to read some back Pages to see if we agree as much on the Issues as this Article would have me believe. I have an FB page, several Blogs, and a strong philosophy about what being a Liberal means. My little Party is called "Patriotic Liberals", and stands against All the Conservative myths, that Liberals are Less Patriotic, Less Strong in their Religious beliefs and Family Values, and that We all want a Socialist Society. I'm a four-tour Vietnam Veteran, and unlike many of my Brethren, the War opened my eyes to the many fallacies of the Conservative beliefs that I was raised with. Enough about me ! Check my out at http://hermansbdailyblog.blogspot.com, and on FaceBook at "Patriotic Liberals". Thanks Again for a great post !

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  3. "As a liberal, you think this country and the world could be better places and want to help make those twin ideals come true. Conservatives" think there's lazy people who need to be punished so they stop taking money from rich people to support their lazy lifestyles... Just wanted to give you what I see as the converse to our idealistic, liberal way of thinking. It's very similar to "spare the rod, spoil the child" and ignores such things as inherited privilege and also assumes all people want to do is just lay around and not do anything unless compelled by some sort of punishment.

    It is impossible to argue with them because everything they say is so silly - for example - Obama is not American, the whole god scary Christian nation stuff (don't get me started on the new popular religious trend - Joseph Smith!), global warming is a myth - the world is flat, you know, all of it, so I just try to get away from them when I encounter them. I know. That's bad. I'm supposed to talk to them. It's hard because they are NOT FUN. Oh, that's what your article was talking about... fun being brought back. As a liberal and a nice, open minded person, I do tend to have more fun than those repubs I'm pretty sure, but it would be much more fun without them which is why I can't wait for the rapture to take them away (if only!).

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  4. Yeah I like the phrase"Jesus is great it's those Christians I can't stand"

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    ReplyDelete